Sunday, November 23, 2008

Warning; a really long pitty party!

For whatever reason, this has been the longest week ever. I miss Tyler so badly and usually I keep myself and the kids pretty busy when he is TDY and the time flies. So naturally when we came down to Utah, I thought for sure the time would go by even faster...boy was I wrong. Maybe its the fact that we just went through the Temple and had literally no time to celebrate after. He left so soon. These back-to-back-to-back trips are killing me and my sullen attitude rubs off on the kids. I try so hard not to cry on the phone to Ty, I know that only makes it harder on him, but sometimes when I hear him say "hi baby!" I can't help it, I just lose it. During the days its not so bad, but at night when its time to put the kids to bed, i can't help but feel our family is incomplete at that moment. I know how important his job is and how much he loves it but I get so jealous sometimes.

I have to tell this story about him and I: During my senior year in high school, my dream was to go to LA and be a back-up dancer. Britney Spears was holding open auditions the end of September for a new video and I had been invited. I had a dance scholarship to SDSU in San Diego. I was already to leave at the end of summer, my mom had my apartment ready and waiting, i had transfered to the Nordstrom down there, ready to work for MAC. But 2 weeks before I was to leave, my best friend/sister came down to Dallas for a visit. And with her she brought some pictures of prom, and immediatley I asked "who is this?" (pointing to Tyler) She told me all about him, how funny he was, "Mr. High School", even about his girlfriend (obviously that didn't stop me)! I then talked to him on the phone a little bit later that evening, I couldn't stop smiling! I prayed very hard about my decision to go to San Diego, always feeling that it was not quite right...By the end of the week I had called and broke up with the boy I had been dating for 2 years, packed my car and drove to Utah. My parents arranged a small basement apartment in Bountiful for me to stay in, I found a great job at a doctors office in Ogden and last minute taken my scholarship to Weber State. I met Ty in person 3 days laletr and we have been inseperable ever since!

i never believed in fate, destiny, any of that stuff until Ty. He still gives me those butterflies in my stomach, that nervous/akward feeling when he comes home early from work. I love being the mother of his crazy children and most of all; being his eternal wife. I really needed this time to rant and rave over my husband. You wouldn't believe how theraputic this has been!